20 Questions To Ask Your Child About School<\/p>\n
Finding out how things are going in your child’s life sometimes takes a bit of strategizing. These tips and questions can help you get the conversation started.<\/em><\/p>\n by Patti Ghezzi<\/p>\n One day your child tells you everything, from the consistency of the macaroni and cheese in the cafeteria to the hard words on the spelling test to the funny conversation she had with her best friend.<\/p>\n The next day…poof.<\/p>\n Parent:\u00a0\u201cSo, what\u2019s going on at school?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n Child:\u00a0\u201cNothing.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n For many parents, the information they receive about what\u2019s happening at school ebbs and flows, especially once their kids hit 10 or 11 years of age. Even younger children may be reluctant sometimes to share the details of school life.<\/p>\n It doesn\u2019t mean that something\u2019s wrong or that you\u2019re somehow missing a key piece of the parenting puzzle. It may simply be that your child is asserting independence and craving a little privacy. \u201cNo one tells parents this,\u201d says\u00a0Peter Sheras<\/a>, a clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Virginia who specializes in adolescent relationships, family relationships, and stress. \u201cParents feel they are not very good at parenting.\u201d<\/p>\n Of course, that\u2019s not the case. You might just need to tweak your approach. Don\u2019t interrogate, Sheras says. Kids don\u2019t want to be grilled. Be subtle; be patient. Learn to listen intently to the words your child does offer. Watch your child\u2019s body language and demeanor. Avoid yes-or-no questions if possible, and be specific. Try escalating\u2014starting with simple questions and gradually delving into more sensitive topics.<\/p>\n If all else fails, wait it out. Try again later with a different approach, such as choosing a different time of day to start a conversation or taking your child out for a burger before asking questions. In a place where she\u2019s comfortable, she might feel more talkative.<\/p>\n Don\u2019t start the conversation with \u201cWe need to have a talk,\u201d Sheras says: \u201cThat\u2019s when a child dives under the table.\u201d<\/p>\n Here are 20 questions that can help you get started.<\/p>\n Talking with your child should be an ongoing process. Keep the dialogue open, and be available so your child can find you when she feels like chatting.<\/p>\n One final piece of advice from Sheras: \u201cKeep talking even when you think your kids aren\u2019t listening,\u201d he says. \u201cYour children are listening whether they act like it or not.\u201d<\/p>\n 10 Ways To Help Your Child Successfully Return to School<\/a><\/p>\n Get Kids Talking About School<\/a><\/p>\n Help Your Child Handle School Bus Bullies<\/a><\/p>\n Increase Your Child\u2019s Emotional Intelligence<\/a><\/p>\n\n
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