{"id":112,"date":"2018-09-04T10:02:44","date_gmt":"2018-09-04T14:02:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/?p=112"},"modified":"2018-09-04T10:02:44","modified_gmt":"2018-09-04T14:02:44","slug":"11-tips-for-becoming-a-peaceful-and-calm-parent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/2018\/09\/04\/11-tips-for-becoming-a-peaceful-and-calm-parent\/","title":{"rendered":"11 Tips for Becoming a Peaceful and Calm Parent"},"content":{"rendered":"<nav id=\"navigation\" class=\"col-full\" role=\"navigation\">\n<section class=\"menus nav-icons nav-icons-1\">\n<nav id=\"navigation\" class=\"col-full\" role=\"navigation\">\n<div class=\"shape_right\"><strong>11 Tips for Becoming a Peaceful and Calm Parent<\/strong><\/div>\n<\/nav>\n<\/section>\n<\/nav>\n<div id=\"content\" class=\"col-full\">\n<div id=\"main-sidebar-container\">\n<section id=\"main\">\n<article class=\"post-39947 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-communication category-dad-father category-mom-mother category-parenting\">\n<div class=\"post-meta\"><i class=\"fa fa-user\"><\/i><span class=\"small\">by<\/span>\u00a0<span class=\"author vcard\"><span class=\"fn\"><a title=\"Posts by Monica Foley, M.Ed.\" href=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/authors\/monicafoley\/\" rel=\"author\">Monica Foley, M.Ed.<\/a><\/span><\/span>\u00a0|\u00a0<i class=\"fa fa-calendar\"><\/i><span class=\"small\">on<\/span>\u00a0<abbr class=\"date time published updated\" title=\"2018-08-06T12:35:02-0700\">August 6, 2018<\/abbr>\u00a0|\u00a0<span class=\"small\">in<\/span>\u00a0<i class=\"fa fa-tags\"><\/i><span class=\"categories\"><a title=\"View all items in Communication\" href=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/category\/communication\/\">Communication<\/a>,\u00a0<a title=\"View all items in Dad\u2019s Corner\" href=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/category\/dad-father\/\">Dad\u2019s Corner<\/a>,\u00a0<a title=\"View all items in Mom\u2019s Corner\" href=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/category\/mom-mother\/\">Mom\u2019s Corner<\/a>,\u00a0<a title=\"View all items in Parenting\" href=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/category\/parenting\/\">Parenting<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<section class=\"entry\">\n<div class=\"at-above-post addthis_default_style addthis_toolbox \" data-title=\"11 Tips for Becoming a Peaceful and Calm Parent\" data-url=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/parenting\/11-tips-for-becoming-a-peaceful-and-calm-parent\/\" data-description=\"Do you want to learn how to stop yelling at your kids when you're angry, annoyed, or frustrated? Read 11 Tips for Becoming a Peaceful and Calm Parent here!\">\n<div class=\"atclear\"><\/div>\n<div id=\"atstbx\" class=\"at4-jumboshare at-style-responsive addthis-smartlayers addthis-animated at4-show\" role=\"region\" aria-labelledby=\"at-10b808fd-5e76-4b29-95ee-e162638362b5\">\n<div class=\"\"><a href=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/calmparentfb.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-39948\" src=\"https:\/\/childdevelopmentinfo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/calmparentfb.jpg\" alt=\"calmparentfb\" width=\"1200\" height=\"628\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Anger and frustration are universal human emotions, but that doesn\u2019t mean you have to be a victim of negative feelings. As adults, we have an obligation to our family and ourselves to avoid allowing our emotions from getting the best of us.<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s face it. Parenting is tough! When you simply want to pee alone or take a shower for more than two minutes without hearing little footsteps outside the curtain, it can be incredibly frustrating. Or, when you\u2019ve told your child for the gazillionth time to turn off the light when they leave a room, it can make you want to pull your hair out.<\/p>\n<p>One way that many parents express their anger and frustration is by yelling at their kids. It\u2019s not because they want to necessarily, but because sometimes they get so overwhelmed, they lose control. Other times it may just be easier to holler than to learn strategies to become a calmer\u00a0parent.<\/p>\n<p>Studies show that yelling makes children more aggressive, physically and verbally. As a parent, raising your voice to the point of screaming scares children and makes them feel insecure. It has been shown to cause long-term effects, such as anxiety, low self-esteem, and increased aggression. A parent who is calm is reassuring, which makes children feel loved and accepted in spite of bad behavior.<\/p>\n<p>There are many responses you can choose when faced with a situation that makes your blood boil. Finding peace is possible! Learn to manage your anger and arrive at a peaceful solution using these strategies:<\/p>\n<p>1.\u00a0<strong>Consider the negative consequences of expressing anger.<\/strong>\u00a0It\u2019s tempting to run with your exasperation in the short-term, but giving in to rage can cause even more challenges. Before lashing out at your kids or taking what you consider to be appropriate actions, consider how things will be when the smoke clears.<\/p>\n<p>2.\u00a0<strong>Give yourself a timeout.<\/strong>\u00a0Timeouts aren\u2019t just for young kids. Adults also need timeouts or short breaks to calm down. Taking deep breaths, give yourself a few minutes to allow a level of reason to return to your mind. You\u2019ll be in a better place to make appropriate parenting decisions.<\/p>\n<p>3.\u00a0<strong>When appropriate, let your family members be wrong.<\/strong>\u00a0It\u2019s not your job to prove that someone is wrong; just allow them to be mistaken. If you have a strong desire to show them that they\u2019re incorrect, that\u2019s your ego barking. Of course, it is your responsibility as a parent to educate your children between right and wrong. At the end of the day, however, you cannot control the choices they make and ultimately they will have to learn from the consequences when they experience errors in judgment.<\/p>\n<p>4.\u00a0<strong>Decide which is more important: being happy or being right.<\/strong>\u00a0Many arguments are the result of the desire to be right. If you choose to be happy over winning every heated discussion with your kids, your life will be more enjoyable, and you will become a more relaxed parent overall. Which is more important to you?<\/p>\n<p>5.\u00a0<strong>Take a minute to notice your anger.<\/strong>\u00a0Instead of mindlessly reacting to your frustration, take a moment to examine it. Pretend you\u2019re a third-party witnessing your irritation and annoyance. What does it feel like to you? Where is the emotion coming from in your body? Is the feeling in your head, chest, or stomach? Has your breathing changed? Are your hands shaking or clenching? By disengaging from your anger, you can gain a different perspective and weaken your negative emotions.<\/p>\n<p>6.\u00a0<strong>Ask yourself why you\u2019re upset.<\/strong>\u00a0Did someone physically harm you? Did they let you down? Violate one of your values? Figure out why you\u2019re frustrated, and you\u2019ll be able to take the necessary steps to discover a solution.<\/p>\n<p>7.\u00a0<strong>Focus on the big picture.<\/strong>\u00a0Imagine that you knew the world would come to an end next Friday. Would you be upset if your child didn\u2019t hang his backpack? Of course not.<\/p>\n<p>8.<strong>\u00a0Look for solutions, rather than trying to make yourself feel better.<\/strong>\u00a0Acting in anger is about making yourself feel better. Rather than yelling at your kids, for instance, work on finding a peaceful solution. The outcome will be much better and well worth your time.<\/p>\n<p>9.\u00a0<strong>Be sure you understand the situation.<\/strong>\u00a0Why get angry with your kids before you know the facts? Ensure the issue isn\u2019t a possible miscommunication.<\/p>\n<p>10.\u00a0<strong>Learn and practice relaxation techniques.<\/strong>\u00a0The more relaxed you are on a regular basis as a parent, the less likely you are to become angry. Relaxation techniques can also be helpful after the fact. Learn how to self-soothe. It\u2019s a skill that can be learned.<\/p>\n<p>11.\u00a0<strong>See your annoyance as a practice opportunity to find peace.<\/strong>\u00a0Each time you feel upset, view the situation as a chance to practice your anger-management skills. It\u2019s a blessing in disguise. Commit yourself to manage this bout of frustration better than you did the last time.<\/p>\n<p>Avoid letting anger, frustration, and annoyance get the best of you. As a thoughtful, loving human being and parent, you have options available to you. Seek to find solutions and peace rather than giving in to your immediate impulses<\/p>\n<\/section>\n<\/article>\n<\/section>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>11 Tips for Becoming a Peaceful and Calm Parent by\u00a0Monica Foley, M.Ed.\u00a0|\u00a0on\u00a0August 6, 2018\u00a0|\u00a0in\u00a0Communication,\u00a0Dad\u2019s Corner,\u00a0Mom\u2019s Corner,\u00a0Parenting Anger and frustration are universal human emotions, but that doesn\u2019t mean you have to be a victim of negative feelings. As adults, we have an obligation to our family and ourselves to avoid allowing our emotions from getting the <a href=\"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/2018\/09\/04\/11-tips-for-becoming-a-peaceful-and-calm-parent\/\">Continue reading &#8594;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":872,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-112","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blogs"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/112","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/872"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=112"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/112\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=112"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=112"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iblog.dearbornschools.org\/charafeddine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=112"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}